The best 538 calorie dinner I’ve ever made.
So I’m on this new diet. I can only eat foods that start with vowels. Just kidding lol. I’m on a very simple diet: low calorie, high fiber. I can’t afford to buy new pants for fit my larger waist size but I can cut my calorie intake and boost my fiber. This diet also saves me money by eating less and buying less. It also fixes my poop. Which is a good thing.
Tonight I had baked crab cakes on top of seaweed with homemade tartar sauce. Oh I also ate a can of salsa because I love salsa.
Let’s start off with the crab cakes. Katie’s mom gave us a bag a while ago. I believe she made it with eggs and bread crumbs. They’re really good. I decided to thaw them in the microwave and bake them in the toaster oven for about 40 minutes. They taste much better when they’re not fried.
While the crab cakes were cooking I went ahead and prepped the sea weed. This is extremely easy. The seaweed come dried, like dried parsley or chives. For crunchy seaweed you just put it in a bowl with hot water. For soft seaweed you put boiling hot water in a bowl with the weed. I made soft seaweed. Bacon Salt
is added to the water for flavor. Strain the seaweed and leave in the strainer. Add more Bacon Salt. I love Bacon Salt. Bacon salt on potato chips is the best chip ever. I put it on everything as a salt substitute. It has zero calories and less sodium than salt. Bacon Salt will change your life. I got mine at my local Acme. Let’s move on.
Salsa. I get canned salsa from Acme for a buck. Just put it in a bowl with flax seed meal for fiber and to soak up the juices. Total calories; 55. Yummy salsa is my favorite.
Next is the tartar sauce. About a tablespoon of the following:
Grey Poupon
Non-fat yogurt
Japanese Kewpie Mayo. The best mayo ever. It comes in a squeeze bottle!
Dill Relish
As a secret ingredient I add about 6 drops of Zatarains Shrimp and Crab Boil. This stuff is the taste of the entire state of Louisiana concentrated into a 8oz bottle. Your supposed to put it in a giant crock pot for seafood but a few drops will bring subtle a taste of Nawlins to any dish
All together the total calorie count for my dinner tonight was 538. That’s so low! It’s actually even lower because sea weed is one of the few foods that have negative calories. A can of Cherry Coke Zero was my dessert.
Do you like salsa so much that you could eat a whole barrel of it?
http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2009/3/30/
brie thats soooo me
I lol’d at your bacon salt tangent.
“Bacon salt will change your life.”