One of our favorite websites, Defector, has a yearly feature on what people have put in their bodies. We decided to look at the most…unique things people have put in their butts
Now, Defector covers medical reports of any foreign object found in a human body, from top to bottom.
But we at Poopable only care about the bottom
That’s right. Things have gotten into butts in medical situations.
Defector inspired one of my last articles with an older post of theirs. Listen, if you write about fossilized poop, I’m going to post about it.
Anyway, Defector released their annual article – What Did We Get Stuck in Our Rectums Last Year?
We at Poopable recommend you subscribe to their site, and especially recommend you read about all of the foreign object that were found in various orifices of individuals in 2023.
But here were our favorite items found in bottoms from this list.
Now, people have been getting items stuck in their bodies as long as we’ve had holes that can get clogged. In fact, Defector covers many orifices, as reported by medical professionals, that encountered obstruction. Ears. Noses. Throats. *coughs* genitalia of both genders.
But we’re going to focus on things placed in the most poopable area. Here were the most…exotic.
Three Cell Phones
Listen. We can’t speak from experience about having a cell phone stuck in your downstairs. But three? If you buy three iPhone 15 Plus phones, that costs roughly $900 per phone. So potentially, that is $2,700. In your butt.
We do not recommend recreating this medical experience, or any of the others we will be describing.
Toilet Plunger
This is where we should point out the the Defector article doesn’t go into detail. It just tells you the object as described by the medical report. So you’re thinking…
“Which end was the entry point.”
Your assumption is likely the correct answer. But you are also thinking…there’s a chance it’s the other side.
A Marble
Who among us hasn’t at least thought about it?
Shampoo Bottle and Toothbrush
One or the other, while not easy to explain, seem like they’re not too uncommon. Well, at least not unheard of.
But we’re trying to grapple with the thought process that led to someone trying to insert BOTH of the above items into their generous orifice.
These items both cleanse in different ways, but we can’t imagine this would be comfortable, for either the patient or the doctor who discovered such a condition.
Pocket Knife
Oh no. Oh, oh no.
Again, we at Poopable want to clarify, none of these objects should be put into your butts.
But we can only pray for the poor individual who made this mistake. We wish them the best.
Neil