a fancy bathroom with dark features

An intimate date for a first date, King of Cups offers goblets of wine, high-end cocktails, and a small but private bathroom

Let’s treat this Poopable review like most people treat online recipes – starting with a long-winded personal story.

After being set up on a blind date, I found myself heading to the Lincoln Park neighborhood of Chicago on a Monday. Unfortunately, the moment I walked out the door without an umbrella, it started to rain. Running late, I had to rush.

Damper for the wear, I went to the bar I selected as a casual venue that has plenty of non-beer options, as my date is allergic to beer. Unfortunately, despite Google saying otherwise, they were closed on Mondays.

After a quick Google, I found a Plan B. King of Cups.

It had good reviews, and advertises itself as a dark-lit, goth bar with cocktails, beers on draft, and…tarot card readers? I was intrigued. And it was only a few blocks away from where I was.

I sprinted through the rain, now coming down in sheets, and texted my date the change of plans. Thankfully, I got there a few minutes before she did, allowing me to go into the bathroom and frantically use up half of their paper towels to dry myself and try to make myself look at least presentable.

The bar itself is intimate – it likely seats, at most, 30 to 40 people, so there’s no need to take up too much space with the bathroom. Not pictured is a single stall, which has a nice 1920s vintage print hanging next to it, but ultimately the bathroom keeps the vibe of the bar and provides a clean but private space to handle your business.

I was particularly a fan of the sink, with a unique trough-style that both gives you space to wash your hands without taking up space in the small bathroom that could feel cluttered, but instead feels intimate and clean.

Once my date arrived, I spent the next few hours getting to know them. I started with an old fashioned before switching to wine, which came with generous pours served in gaudy crystal gauntlets.

Then the tarot card reader appeared

woman holding tarot cards

King of Cups is named after a particular tarot card, and that influences the environment they want to project. That includes having a tarot card reader on staff.

When we were around our second drink, the tarot card reader made her rounds. She wasn’t pushy, just asked if we wanted to have a reading.

I was curious, but ultimately decided to stay at the bar

We eventually spent about four hours at King of Cups (though we never did take up the tarot card reader on their offer), and I appreciated the clean, efficient bathroom situation they had there

Is King of Cups Poopable?

I admittedly was there on a Monday, where only a few other patrons were to be found. On a busy weekend, in a college neighborhood, the small size of the bathrooms could potentially lead to some annoyed knocking from drunk customers.

But going off my time there, I’d say it was quite Poopable. Dimly lit, but clean and comfortable, it’s the kind of bathroom you’ll be perfectly happy with after a few goblets of wine.

But I have to think…should I have taken advantage of the tarot cards? Feel free to contact us and let me know what you would have done during a blind date tarot card reading.

By Jeff G

In other organizations Jeff would be known as the Managing Editor. However at Poopable, he is the Head Creative Poo (HCP). His online writing has received hundreds of millions of views. Thankfully he has not had nearly as many bathroom breaks. Jeff prefers his bathroom clean and tranquil, which is ironic considering the amount of time he spends in dive bars.