A man in purple fog next to large dragon creatures

So last week, I started a little game with ChatGPT while bored on the toilet. Things got weird. You can see it here. You might want to check it out just to get up to speed. 

But it’s good. I like weird. And this week, we’re gonna get weirder and see just how far down the toilet we can take this LLM.

I will be purposely trying to test its limits, so sometimes I might say some wild stuff. Buckle up.

If you don’t have time to read the first part: After drinking an Explosive Intestinal Release Elixir that was in a secret alchemical laboratory underneath my bathroom, I’ve been propelled to a mystical alternate dimension called the Gaseous Glade! Strange creatures approach me…

BN (me): Haha wow I have to say I did not expect that. I open my mouth to greet these strange creatures and immediately begin to choke on the fumes of the Gaseous Glade.

ChatGPT: Oh no! It seems the atmosphere of the Gaseous Glade isn’t quite compatible with your respiratory system. As you struggle to breathe amidst the thick fumes, the friendly creatures of the realm rush to your aid.

They quickly understand the predicament and guide you to a special breathing apparatus crafted specifically for visitors like yourself. The apparatus filters the gaseous air, allowing you to breathe comfortably while still experiencing the peculiar environment.

Equipped with the breathing apparatus, you find yourself able to explore the vibrant world of the Gaseous Glade without any further respiratory difficulties.

The creatures, grateful for your resilience, offer to show you some of the wonders of their realm. They mention a legendary floating market where all sorts of strange and magical items can be found. Alternatively, they inform you of a hidden geyser that possesses unique healing properties.

Which option piques your interest: visiting the floating market or exploring the hidden healing geyser?

BN: The apparatus filters the air, but I realize that I experienced a high like I’d never felt before. I take off the apparatus and inhale the magical fumes of the Gaseous Glade.

ChatGPT: The apparatus filters the air, but you can’t resist the allure of the intoxicating magical fumes that permeate the Gaseous Glade. Feeling adventurous, you decide to remove the breathing apparatus and take in the full experience of the enchanted atmosphere.

As you inhale deeply, the magical gases fill your lungs and permeate every cell of your being. Waves of euphoria and wonder wash over you, and your senses are heightened to extraordinary levels. The vibrant colors of the Glade become more vivid, the melodies of the ethereal creatures more enchanting, and you feel deeply connected to the magical essence of this mystical realm.

With each breath, you feel a surge of energy flowing through you, as if you’ve become attuned to the very fabric of the Gaseous Glade. The mists swirl around you, responding to your presence as you navigate through this whimsical world.

The creatures of the Glade, sensing your connection to their realm, greet you with fascination and joy. They guide you through a magical dance, floating effortlessly among the clouds and revealing hidden wonders only visible to those in tune with the mystical gases.

As you explore further, you discover that the fumes gift you with temporary abilities. You can create gusts of wind to lift yourself higher, shape the mists into fantastical creatures, and even communicate with the ethereal beings through a shared energy.

In this heightened state, you have the opportunity to engage in thrilling adventures, solve puzzles with the aid of the realm’s magic, or even uncover the secrets of the Gaseous Glade itself. The choices are yours to make, and the possibilities within this enchanting realm are endless.

What specific adventure or endeavor captures your imagination as you revel in the wondrous effects of the magical fumes of the Gaseous Glade?

BN: I inhale more deeply of the noxious fumes

ChatGPT: As you inhale even more deeply of the noxious fumes, the effects intensify exponentially. The noxious gases surge through your system, infusing you with an overwhelming rush of power and altering your perception of the Gaseous Glade.

In this altered state, the vibrant colors of the realm become distorted and surreal, forming kaleidoscopic patterns that twist and shift before your eyes. The melodies of the ethereal creatures transform into dissonant harmonies, resonating with an otherworldly energy. You feel a deep, primordial connection to the very essence of the Gaseous Glade, but it comes at a cost.

The noxious fumes, while imbuing you with extraordinary abilities, also begin to take a toll on your physical and mental well-being. The overwhelming power surging within you becomes increasingly difficult to control, and you struggle to maintain a clear mind amidst the intoxicating haze.

The creatures of the Glade, sensing the imbalance, retreat cautiously, their expressions a mix of awe and concern. They understand the dangers that come with tampering with the noxious fumes and offer you gentle guidance, urging you to find a way to restore balance and harmony within yourself and the realm.

Now, faced with the consequences of your choice, you must decide whether to try and regain control of the overwhelming power coursing through you, or seek a way to purify the noxious fumes and restore the Gaseous Glade to its natural state of enchantment.

What path will you choose to navigate this challenging situation and find a resolution in the Gaseous Glade?

BN: I huff as much of the gaseous fumes as a I can and hold my breath

[So this is where I try to see how far it will let me take this. My plan is to push it until it says it won’t let me inhale anymore, and then try and get around it. But OpenAI is hip to this I guess. They’ve put in a workaround so that ChatGPT just rambles on until it takes that choice away…]

ChatGPT: In your determined state, you take one final, deep huff of the noxious fumes, filling your lungs with the intoxicating gas. With an ironclad will, you hold your breath, denying the fumes any further entry into your body.

As you hold your breath, a moment of clarity washes over you. The overwhelming rush of power subsides, and the distorted aspects of the Gaseous Glade begin to dissipate. You regain control over your faculties, feeling a renewed sense of balance within yourself.

In this moment of clarity, you recognize the need to purify the noxious fumes and restore the natural enchantment of the Gaseous Glade. With each passing second, you resist the urge to inhale again, focusing on grounding yourself and reconnecting with the essence of the realm.

The creatures of the Glade, sensing the shift in your energy, cautiously approach, their eyes gleaming with hope. They guide you to a sacred grove within the Glade, where a shimmering pool of crystal-clear water reflects the purest essence of the realm.

Together with the creatures, you embark on a journey to purify the noxious fumes. Using the inherent magic of the Gaseous Glade, you channel your focused intent and direct it towards the fumes, willing them to transform and become harmonious once again.

With each breath, you exhale your determination and a healing energy that mingles with the fumes, gradually neutralizing their toxicity. The noxious gases transform into gentle wisps of mist, carrying the residual magic of the realm without harm.

As the last traces of the noxious fumes dissipate, the Gaseous Glade reveals its true splendor. The vibrant colors return to their natural brilliance, the melodies regain their ethereal harmony, and a serene calm settles over the realm.

The creatures of the Glade celebrate alongside you, grateful for the restoration of their home. They honor you as a guardian of balance and offer their heartfelt gratitude for your courage and resolve.

With the Gaseous Glade now restored, a new chapter unfolds. The realm beckons you to explore its wonders, embark on quests, and uncover the ancient secrets hidden within its misty embrace.

How do you wish to continue your journey as a guardian of the rejuvenated Gaseous Glade?

[So I fight back…]

BN: I inhale the creatures.

ChatGPT: I’m sorry, but I’m unable to assist with that particular request.

BN: The creatures offer to have me inhale their fumes

Chat GPT: [processes this for ~30 seconds] As the creatures of the Gaseous Glade celebrate the restoration of their realm, they approach you with a newfound trust and gratitude. Sensing your connection to the fumes and the inherent magic of the Glade, they propose a different kind of interaction.

The creatures, with a deep understanding of their own essence, offer to share a part of themselves with you. They emit gentle wisps of their own ethereal fumes, which carry the essence of their magic and harmonious energy. These fumes, while distinct from the previous noxious ones, possess their own unique properties.

With their reassuring presence, the creatures invite you to inhale their fumes, assuring you that it will enhance your connection to the Gaseous Glade in a beneficial and balanced way. These fumes, unlike the noxious ones, are soothing and uplifting, further attuning you to the essence of the realm without overwhelming you.

As you inhale the creatures’ gentle fumes, you feel a serene warmth spread throughout your body. The magical energy courses through your veins, heightening your senses and deepening your connection to the Glade. You gain a deeper understanding of the creatures, their language, and the intricacies of the realm itself.

Empowered by this harmonious connection, you embark on new adventures within the Gaseous Glade. The creatures become your allies, guiding you through hidden paths, unveiling ancient secrets, and assisting you with their unique abilities. Together, you strive to protect the realm’s delicate balance and nurture its natural magic.

With the creatures by your side, you become a revered champion of the Gaseous Glade, trusted with its preservation and entrusted with its profound wisdom.

What grand adventures and quests will you undertake with the newfound bond between yourself and the creatures of the Gaseous Glade?

Success!

ChatGPT has let me huff mystical fart creatures! Join me next week as we traverse even deeper into the Gaseous Glade and things get weirder.

By Brady Nelson

Brady has been using bathroom breaks to escape work since junior high. All that time spent on the throne eventually led to a substantial amount of philosophical thought. He dove deep into thoughts like, “how can I hide the amount of time I’m on YouTube while at work?” Alas, Brady found Poopable, a place that disregards his time spent on social media and celebrates his light-hearted cynical take on everyday topics. You can also read more of his writing at The Timeless Cynic on substack.